A Story I Loved: "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love" by Raymond Carver

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Ah. One of Raymond Carver’s finest. 

Carver is an enamoring writer because I feel as though I’ve read him everywhere, in books that don't bear his name- after the explosion of dirty minimalism, there are a host of writers who have gone on to mimic, or at the very least, unconsciously allow themselves to be influenced by his style. I think a lot of what somebody once said about Orson Welles’ magnum opus “Citizen Kane”- that if you don’t like the movie because you can spot all the tired cliches, you’re missing the point. Citizen Kane created the cliches- it’s the original, real thing.

No one does it quite like Carver, too. I know when I’m reading a Carver story- the way he can spin solid words into the human heart. And that’s most exemplified by this piece- which, has long ceased to be my favorite piece of his, but still important for various symbolic reasons, for being a damned fine piece of good work, and for simply the fact that it summarizes his literary legacy very well, if you are trying to teach something to someone about the way he writes.

The story revolves around two couples discussing what love is. A simple premise, and the ensuing conversation really is very simple, and yet has the intimacy of four people discussing what love really is- without the posturing you usually see in literature, because it’s so aware of an audience. Here, the conversation is grounded by the fact that there is no one watching, and so the couples can discuss the ins and outs of what love is- dirty, clean, cheap, expensive, hard, easy. One member of the couple has been in an abusive relationship, but Carver is not trying to be dogmatic here. The woman confesses that she still believes the abuse was a form of love. Her husband vehemently disagrees, which is likely a stand-in viewpoint for the audience as well. There are other examples of love- an old couple maimed in a car accident, even Mel’s feelings towards his own wife. Love- the oldest question in the literary book. Aren’t we all sort of trying to pin it down, in its various ways? Love is comorbid, and it can be an affliction, but it can also be a trying, valiant thing. But who is to say one thing is love and another is not? I keep thinking, as I read this story, about how much the nature of writing is about questions. There are never any clean answers- at least in the fiction I tend to enjoy. There are only interesting questions posed, and the act of questioning allows you to come closer to an answer. 

That’s what Carver is trying to do here. He’s trying to minnow towards a point using four different perspectives. By seeing where the shadows of the conversation fall, you can see what each person is getting at. There’s something a little bit more focused in the fullness of these anecdotes, I think, as opposed to something like Denis Johnson’s “Largesse of the Sea Maiden”. I think texture was a concern here, but it’s not really the point of the story. But Carver’s magic trick, I think, and the reason why is work is so enduring, is that despite the thematic heaviness of his work, despite the fact that you can sometimes see the paint-strokes of what is he moving towards, it never comes off as clunky or cliched. He is, after all, the original master. The conversations move, with light and stillness in the right places, and know when to rest. Something that could easily become treacly manages to keep its shape. 

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Resources:

Raymond Carver- "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love" https://tnsatlanta.org/wp-content/uploads/What-We-Talk-About-When-We-Talk-About-Love-Carver.pdf